Ever felt that gnawing void inside, like you're drifting in an endless sea with no land in sight? Those dark days where everything seems pointless. Every effort feels like a drop in a bottomless well. It's like you're running on a treadmill, sweating and pushing, but getting nowhere. It's tough, right?
When I was at my lowest lows and felt like this. It was when I had no goals and no direction. It was just a bleak expanse of nothingness. My mind would spiral into this abyss where everything felt futile. I was lacking motivation. I was devoid of any purpose. When you don’t have clear goals or can’t see any progress, it’s like being stuck in quicksand. The harder you struggle, the deeper you sink.
Believe me, a lack of goals is one of the most soul-crushing experiences we can face. Without goals, there's no purpose. Without a purpose, life feels like an aimless journey. It's like driving with no destination, you're moving, but where are you going? This is paralyzing, sapping the energy out of you.
The good news is that this isn't a permanent state. It’s a call to action. When you hit these lows, it’s your mind and soul screaming for direction. You need to frame your mind differently. Finding your purpose is like flipping a switch. It brings light to the darkest corners, and sets you back on track.
How do we go from feeling empty to feeling alive again? Let’s dive into it.
The Illusion of Happiness and the Empty Feeling
We’re constantly fed this narrative that happiness is the ultimate goal. Shown through the flashy cars, the high-status job and the perfect relationships. These things are supposed to make us happy, right? But here’s the thing. That kind of happiness is a mirage. You chase it, thinking it’ll fill the void, but when you get there, it’s still empty. Like sand slipping through your fingers.
I learned this the hard way. I was chasing external validation, thinking it would bring me peace. Bigger paycheck? Check. Fancy toys? Check. But the more I got, the more hollow I felt. It wasn’t just about wanting more; it was about realizing that none of it mattered if I didn’t have a deeper purpose.
That's why I find it important to remember Viktor Frankl. A man who survived the unimaginable horrors of Nazi concentration camps. He wrote one of the most impactful books ever written: "Man’s Search for Meaning". In it he talks about how many prisoners, despite enduring extreme suffering, lost their will to live when they lost their sense of purpose. Frankl’s message is clear:
True happiness doesn’t come from outside sources. It comes from within, from having a purpose that gives your life meaning.
So, how does this apply to you and me? We’ve got to stop pinning our happiness on external achievements and start looking inward. Stoicism teaches us to let go of these attachments. It’s about focusing on what we can control. We can only control our thoughts, and by extension our actions, our mindset and our responses. This shift in perspective allows us to take full responsibility for how we live our lives. This perspective builds inner strength and resilience.
When you stop clinging to external things, you start to feel less empty. You become grounded, capable of facing adversity without losing your way. The world can throw its worst at you, but if you’ve got purpose, you’ll stand firm. So, stop chasing illusions. Start building a life that means something to you.
The Power of Purpose and Meaning
If you're feeling empty and aimless, it’s because you’re lacking this crucial part of life. Purpose is your lifeline. It’s what keeps you moving forward, no matter how tough things get. And Viktor Frankl illustrates this perfectly. The man was in the depths of hell. Or as close to hell as you can get; a Nazi concentration camp. Yet he found a way to survive by clinging to his sense of purpose.
Frankl survived what so many didn't because he had something to hold onto. He found purpose in helping his fellow prisoners. He found purpose in his work as a doctor. And he also found purpose in his deep personal reflections. This wasn’t merely a coping mechanism—it was his lifeblood. It gave him strength in the face of unimaginable hardship. His story is a testament to how powerful purpose can be.
How can we harness this power in our own lives? It starts with setting clear goals and understanding why they matter to you. This isn’t about vague aspirations or wishful thinking. It’s about concrete, actionable objectives that give your life direction. When you know what you want and why you want it, you create a roadmap. And with a roadmap, every step you take has meaning. That is how you find purpose. As Jordan B. Peterson says: The higher the aim, the more positive the emotion.
As a Stoic, embracing this mindset means focusing on what you can control. It’s about setting goals that align with your values and pursuing them relentlessly. This will fill the void. Having an aim, a purpose, gives you a sense of fulfillment that can't be matched. With a purpose you’ll be thriving, even in adversity.
Imagine waking up each day with a clear sense of purpose. You’re no longer drifting. You’re moving forward, making progress, and feeling more alive than ever. The emptiness fades as you fill your life with meaning. You start to see that even in the darkest times, purpose is your guide. So, set those goals, find your why, and watch how it transforms your life.
Purpose is the spark behind motivation and discipline. It's what drives athletes and entrepreneurs to push through the grueling grind needed to succeed.
The Importance of Living in the Present
It’s so easy to get caught up in regrets about the past or anxieties about the future. But the truth is that the only moment that really exists is right now. Viktor Frankl realized this fact. Even while still in a concentration camp. He writes that those focused on the present moment, rather than the horrors of the past or the uncertainty of the future, found a way to cope, to survive.
I’ve been there too, stuck in my head. Replaying old mistakes or worrying about things that might never happen. It’s a mental prison. I needed to break free and anchor myself in the here and now. The present is where life happens. It’s where you have power, where you can make changes, and where you can find peace.
This idea is pure gold, and aligns well with stoicism. It’s about letting go of what you can’t control. When you focus on the present, you’re not weighed down by the past or paralyzed by the future. You become more grounded, more content. You start to appreciate the simple, beautiful moments that you’d otherwise miss.
Imagine you’re at a coffee shop, sipping your favorite brew. Instead of scrolling through your phone or stressing about your to-do list, you just sit there. Being present. You taste the coffee. You feel the warmth of the cup. You hear the ambient chatter. That’s living. That’s where you find peace and contentment.
Living in the present isn’t just a nice idea. It’s THE way to live. It makes you more resilient, less empty, and more alive. It’s about embracing the now, with all its imperfections, and finding joy in it. It's also the only way to experience the flow state. So next time you catch yourself drifting into the past or future, pull yourself back. Breathe.
The past brings regrets and the future brings anxiety. Focus on the here and now. It’s the only moment that matters, and it’s where you’ll find "optimal existence".
Finding Fulfillment: Your Path Forward
Let’s bring it all together. We’ve unpacked some heavy stuff here, but hopefully not too heavy.
First, ditch the illusion of happiness from external sources. Stop chasing shiny objects that only leave you feeling emptier. Instead, look inward and find that deeper meaning. Viktor Frankl showed us that even in the darkest times, purpose is our guide. It’s not about what you have; it’s about why you’re here.
Second, to find purpose, set clear and meaningful goals. Know what you want and why you want it. This gives you direction and turns every day into an opportunity. A starch contrast to another round on the hamster wheel we all dread. Purpose transforms your actions into progress, filling that void with meaning.
Finally, live in the present. Stop dwelling on past mistakes or fearing future uncertainties. Embrace the now, because it’s the only place where life truly unfolds. Being present keeps you grounded. It helps you find peace and joy in the simplest of moments.
So, what’s next? Action. Take these principles and apply them. Start small—reflect on your purpose and set a goal. Remember: It’s a marathon, not a sprint.
Life’s too short to feel empty. Fill it with purpose, live with intention, and embrace every moment. You’ve got this.
Let's get to work.
Comments
Post a Comment